my story

 First of all, ALHAMDULILLAH dengan izin-Nya saya masih lagi diberikan nafas dan di anugerahkan nikmat yang tidak terhingga; kelahiran bayi perempuan kami ke muka bumi Allah ini.

 Maha Suci Allah.

Banyak dugaan yang kami tempuhi sebelum dianugerahkan permata hati kami itu. It didn’t turn out as what we wanted it to be, kami hanyalah hamba yang lemah kadang-kadang terlupa yang segala perancangan itu adalah suatu ujian untuk kita sebenarnya kerana hanya Dia yang menentukan apa yang terbaik untuk kita.

So here is my story. 

Thursday, 28/12/2007

I went to see Dr.Noraini for her opinion regarding induce labor. I just need 2^ndfrom the gynae. I had the vaginal examination (VE) and was confirmed that the tissue around the cervix is already soft which indicates that the induce hormone –prostin will work well in a suitable condition.We had a discussion on the pros & cons and effects of the procedure and  I was scheduled to be admitted to the ward at 10pm Sunday 30/12/2007and prostin will be administered at 3am the next morning.

However, I secretly praying that lil’one will make the debut appearance by its own.

 Sunday, 30/12/2007Woke up from bed with a feeling of wet panty. Checked and it did feel wet. Informed hubby but decided to play wait and see. Continue to pack things for my confinement in Seremban.2.15pm - discovered a brown stain. Feeling a bit scarred not knowing what to do. Fortunately Sister Ruby called and asked her about it. She advised me to relax and go to the hospital. Do not rush and panic, she said.By the time we finished our lunch, emak and ayah arrived and told them about stain. Mak cakap, ha tu dah tanda-tanda lah tu.                                                         

 Last pregnant picture @ 40 weeks

4.15pm - Off we go to the hospital.6.30pm– Dr Noraini came and I was administered with prostin. The hormone should be working within 6 hours.After about 30 mins, I started to feel the contraction. Sakitnya macam period pain. I still can walk around.

CTG result : baby’s heartbeat OK, contraction : MILD.

12.30pm– VE result: -ve.

The cervix has not dilated yet. To wait for Dr. Noraini the next morning.   

Monday, 31/12/2007

7.00am – Dr Noraini came and again administered prostin for the 2^nd attempt. Again to wait for result in 6 hours. I was hoping the contraction will be stronger, but strangely I didn’t feel any contraction at all. It was better this time. Even had the energy to climb the staircase and went for a drink at the restaurant nearby.I started to feel anxious with the situation.

1.00pm– Dr Noraini came for a review. VE result : -ve

I was still ‘closed’. And we were given 2 options : To take prostin for the last attempt or proceed with C-Sec.Still hoping that I will ‘open’, we opted for prostin with high hope that I can deliver my baby with normal CVS procedure.

Now the time is killing me. Waiting is agony.

Angah and makbusu came for moral support but I still tensed for the next 6 hours.

7.30pm– VE result : -ve.

The maximum dose of prostin have been given, there was a constant MILD contraction but could not initiate the cervix to open thus failure for normal cervical delivery.Since the hormone was still in my system, it will continue to initiate contraction to the uterus and even though the cervix is not dilated, thus can cause bad complications to my baby & I; i.e: uterine rupture.

I was devastated.

The only option we had was C-Sect procedure.

Allah sahaja yang tahu perasaanku pada masa itu.

I tried to stay calm and control my emotions when I, half-heartedly agree and signed the Letter of Consent for the procedure, but when hubby & I were left alone, I broke my tears.

I was frustated. I was not ready for this situation. My mental was not prepared for this decision. My heart hurt. We were both were not prepare for this.

(I ‘m still emotional as I’m typing this)

I’m fortunate that hubby was around all the time and stayed cool. Kalau dia pun emotional jugak tak boleh nak bayangkan dua2 nangis bagai nak rak time tu.           

                                  

(Not so) prepare for the procedure

8.30pm - I was wheel-chaired to the operation room. Still crying.

I was being operated

9.31pm - I heard the cry of our baby for the 1st time. I cried when hearing abi azan & iqamat to our daughter. It was miracle. Undescribable feeling to hear the voice of our baby.

Our daughter, was born on 31st December 2007 at 9.31pm weighted at 3.1kg.

Maha Suci Allah. Allah hu Akbar. 

” Hello sweetheart, you can call me ummi “, our 1st met after 40 weeks

 I wanted share about the post-op experience, however I decided to let it be in another post. I dont want to kill the excitement of yours. hehe

Now ladies and gentlement, I proudly present your our pride, our joy, our love :

TASNEEM ATHIRAH BT MUHAMAD IBRAHIM